Men drifting to the right, women to the left... What could go wrong? (09-13-2024--Hour1)

[00:00:04] [SPEAKER_02]: What's going on? Thank you so much for listening to this podcast. It is heard live every day from noon to three on WBT radio in Charlotte. And if you want exclusive content like invitations to events, the weekly live stream, my daily show prep with all the links, become a patron, go to ThePeteKalinerShow.com. Make sure you hit the subscribe button, get every episode for free right to your smartphone or tablet. And again, thank you so much for your support.

[00:00:28] [SPEAKER_02]: Shout out to the Kiwanis Club of Charlotte. They raised all of the money that they needed to raise for their or through their coolest dog contest that we have been helping to promote. They were able to give away more than $15,000 to local charities, local organizations that help kids in the community. So thank you if you played a part in that. I appreciate it and good job to the Kiwanis Club. I was unable

[00:00:58] [SPEAKER_02]: to attend the handing out of the money event yesterday. I was I was at an HOA related function. But okay, well it's we're not even the HOA. I'm not part of the HOA. Because the HOA is still controlled by our builder. They've been in charge of the HOA for like 15 years. It's crazy.

[00:01:30] [SPEAKER_02]: And they don't turn it over to the homeowners until it's 100% sold out and they just keep buying more land and building more homes. So they just they've just kept the property or kept the HOA. So anyway, yes, but I am fully refreshed now from them. That's not true. That's a lie. Okay, not actually fully refreshed.

[00:01:51] [SPEAKER_02]: You saw right through me. That's true. Okay.

[00:01:55] [SPEAKER_02]: So at the end of the show yesterday, we were talking a little bit about

[00:02:02] [SPEAKER_02]: Kamala Harris going down among the men among the dudes not really getting a lot of support from male voters. And this has been a problem for the Democrats for a while and it's it's progressing. It's well, no pun intended there. But it is it's not

[00:02:24] [SPEAKER_02]: It's not resolving itself. And I said yesterday,

[00:02:27] [SPEAKER_02]: This is not a good thing in my mind. You don't want racialized parties. You don't want

[00:02:34] [SPEAKER_02]: sexualized parties unless of course you're going to be like, you know, reading graphic books to kids at the library.

[00:02:42] [SPEAKER_02]: I kid I kid.

[00:02:45] [SPEAKER_02]: No, you don't you don't want parties to be identifiable based on some characteristic like that. That's just not in my view. That's not a good path for the society to be on.

[00:02:58] [SPEAKER_02]: So along those lines, there were a couple other pieces and I didn't get to them yesterday, but they are

[00:03:05] [SPEAKER_02]: They are worth exploring because the election is now just a couple of days away, like 50 days, 54 days, something like that. 53 days away early voting getting ready to start.

[00:03:17] [SPEAKER_02]: There are not apparently going to be any more debates. You know, Kamala Harris turned down.

[00:03:23] [SPEAKER_02]: I think two of them at this point. Trump says he's not going to debate again.

[00:03:26] [SPEAKER_02]: Everybody saying that's because he won or he lost and she's saying it's because she won or it's because she lost. I don't know. It doesn't matter. They're probably not going to debate anymore.

[00:03:37] [SPEAKER_02]: So there were two pieces. One is by Rachel Kleinfeld and she is a writer at persuasion.com. She is a senior fellow at the Carnegie Endowment for International Peace.

[00:03:54] [SPEAKER_02]: And the story was originally published by the American Institute for Boys and Men.

[00:04:01] [SPEAKER_02]: And the title of it was To Save Democracy Help Men.

[00:04:06] [SPEAKER_02]: That was the original title. Persuasion.community. I don't know if there's a .com there. It might just be .community.

[00:04:17] [SPEAKER_02]: But it's a free newsletter. I get it in my inbox and if I see something that's worthwhile, I'll flag it. And I flagged this one a while ago.

[00:04:27] [SPEAKER_02]: And actually at the beginning of the year. So that's how long this has been going on. But in a general sense, they relabeled this, re-headlined this thing as why men are drifting to the far right.

[00:04:42] [SPEAKER_02]: Which I don't know if you can detect there was a slight difference in that headline. Why men are drifting to the far right versus To Save Democracy Help Men.

[00:04:53] [SPEAKER_02]: It's a little bit of a difference there, but she said there was a she was talking about an analysis in the Financial Times that confirmed what many researchers had long suspected, which was that the ideological gap between the two groups was very large.

[00:05:08] [SPEAKER_02]: Between men and women is growing.

[00:05:13] [SPEAKER_02]: Gap is growing. Over the past 15 years, men not just in America but across the globe have voted for radical right wing parties.

[00:05:27] [SPEAKER_02]: And she talks about Spain and Poland, Sweden, and Brazil, and Argentina. He's actually a, he's more of like a libertarian. I don't know about, it's not far right. See here's the problem with these labels is that the term far right gets tossed around to describe conservative.

[00:05:47] [SPEAKER_02]: And you never hear far left. You barely ever hear left. It's usually just, you know, left leaning or something if you see it.

[00:05:57] [SPEAKER_02]: She says though the United States is no exception.

[00:06:00] [SPEAKER_02]: As women moved strongly to the left, men have moved to the right.

[00:06:06] [SPEAKER_02]: Creating a gap between male and female voting that was greater for Trump in 2016 than in a half century of exit polling.

[00:06:16] [SPEAKER_02]: Which again like doesn't that make some bit of sense? Hillary Clinton, the first woman, historic candidacy, all of that.

[00:06:24] [SPEAKER_02]: Doesn't it make sense that there would be more women voting for Hillary just because she's a woman?

[00:06:31] [SPEAKER_02]: While much more has been written on the role of race in recent elections, gender is playing. Now I wonder why that would be the case? Why would race be the case?

[00:06:42] [SPEAKER_02]: Why would people be focusing on that? Could it have been the first black president America elected? I think it might be. But black men are moving towards Donald Trump.

[00:06:54] [SPEAKER_02]: They've been doing that for a little while now. Well really ever since Donald Trump came around but um,

[00:07:00] [SPEAKER_02]: She says gender is playing a crucial and different role. White men formed Trump's core support in 2016, but by 2020 Trump pulled 12 points better with black men than black women.

[00:07:13] [SPEAKER_02]: Winning 18% of the black male vote. I have said this for years.

[00:07:22] [SPEAKER_02]: When black voters vote like all of the other racial demographics or closer to how the other racial demographics vote.

[00:07:31] [SPEAKER_02]: Which is more evenly split.

[00:07:34] [SPEAKER_02]: The Democrat party is basically done winning at national elections.

[00:07:41] [SPEAKER_02]: If black voters split their votes up, Democrats don't win anymore.

[00:07:45] [SPEAKER_02]: So reliant is the party on African American voters.

[00:07:50] [SPEAKER_02]: Which is why I would submit they engage in the kind of scare mongering and demagoguery that we have seen out of them for the last 20 years.

[00:08:00] [SPEAKER_02]: That I've been paying attention. Most notably, you know, Joe Biden. They're gonna put Joe back in chains like that kind of garbage.

[00:08:08] [SPEAKER_02]: Um, she goes on to say that uh people who care about democracy.

[00:08:15] [SPEAKER_02]: Could read these numbers and conclude that they should simply double down on getting women to vote.

[00:08:21] [SPEAKER_02]: But giving up on half of one's country is not good civics nor is it smart electoral math.

[00:08:29] [SPEAKER_02]: All right, so what is she trying to argue for? She's trying to argue for Democrats to try to appeal to men.

[00:08:36] [SPEAKER_02]: The problem now again, this was written back in January.

[00:08:40] [SPEAKER_02]: So the idea that uh, Kamala Harris is now the uh, the nominee wasn't even on the radar here.

[00:08:47] [SPEAKER_02]: Because back then Joe Biden was a spry young chicken.

[00:08:50] [SPEAKER_02]: And then he aged like decades in six months.

[00:08:55] [SPEAKER_02]: The problem is not that men are natural crusaders for authoritarian populists.

[00:09:02] [SPEAKER_02]: I don't even know what to make of that sentence.

[00:09:05] [SPEAKER_02]: I don't even know what to make of it. Like, is she saying, okay, that's not the problem?

[00:09:11] [SPEAKER_02]: That like you may think that men are natural crusaders for authoritarian populists, but that's not true.

[00:09:17] [SPEAKER_02]: Or is she saying that men are natural crusaders for authoritarian populists, but that's not really the problem.

[00:09:25] [SPEAKER_02]: I don't know.

[00:09:26] [SPEAKER_02]: It's poorly written.

[00:09:27] [SPEAKER_02]: Anyway, she says, in fact,

[00:09:28] [SPEAKER_02]: American men are much more likely

[00:09:30] [SPEAKER_02]: to be politically apathetic

[00:09:32] [SPEAKER_02]: and most young men are better characterized

[00:09:35] [SPEAKER_02]: as confused and drifting.

[00:09:41] [SPEAKER_02]: Now how did that happen?

[00:09:42] [SPEAKER_02]: However, could that have happened?

[00:09:44] [SPEAKER_02]: All right, real quick, let me introduce you

[00:09:45] [SPEAKER_02]: to my friends Gabriel and Michelle,

[00:09:47] [SPEAKER_02]: two lifelong North Carolinians

[00:09:48] [SPEAKER_02]: who are passionate about everything North Carolina.

[00:09:51] [SPEAKER_02]: They own Simply NC Goods,

[00:09:53] [SPEAKER_02]: which is a curated box service

[00:09:55] [SPEAKER_02]: of only North Carolina made items,

[00:09:58] [SPEAKER_02]: food, beverages, home decor, skincare, artwork,

[00:10:01] [SPEAKER_02]: pretty much anything NC.

[00:10:03] [SPEAKER_02]: And time's running out to get the holiday themed box.

[00:10:06] [SPEAKER_02]: So order before October 15th.

[00:10:08] [SPEAKER_02]: These boxes make great gifts for friends and family,

[00:10:11] [SPEAKER_02]: even yourself, you can do that.

[00:10:13] [SPEAKER_02]: House warmings, birthdays, Christmas, host gifts,

[00:10:16] [SPEAKER_02]: grab some extra ones,

[00:10:17] [SPEAKER_02]: have on hand for when you need a quick gift.

[00:10:19] [SPEAKER_02]: Support small North Carolina businesses the easy way.

[00:10:22] [SPEAKER_02]: Visit simplyncgoods.com slash Pete

[00:10:25] [SPEAKER_02]: and check out the various sizes,

[00:10:27] [SPEAKER_02]: especially the jumbo box just for the holidays.

[00:10:31] [SPEAKER_02]: That's simplyncgoods.com slash Pete.

[00:10:34] [SPEAKER_02]: Going over this piece by Rachel Kleinfeld at Persuasion,

[00:10:39] [SPEAKER_02]: although it was originally published

[00:10:40] [SPEAKER_02]: by the American Institute for Boys and Men.

[00:10:45] [SPEAKER_02]: And she's talking about the research

[00:10:48] [SPEAKER_02]: that the Financial Times published earlier in the year

[00:10:51] [SPEAKER_02]: confirming that the ideological gap

[00:10:54] [SPEAKER_02]: between men and women is growing.

[00:10:57] [SPEAKER_02]: And she says, men are better characterized

[00:11:02] [SPEAKER_02]: as confused and drifting.

[00:11:05] [SPEAKER_02]: They're politically apathetic.

[00:11:07] [SPEAKER_02]: The problem is, she says,

[00:11:10] [SPEAKER_02]: that anti-democratic and violent forces

[00:11:12] [SPEAKER_02]: are trying to weaponize that aimlessness.

[00:11:17] [SPEAKER_02]: Politics is coming into most men's lives subtly.

[00:11:20] [SPEAKER_02]: They look for belonging, purpose and advice

[00:11:24] [SPEAKER_02]: and find a mix of grifters, political hacks

[00:11:27] [SPEAKER_02]: and violent extremists who lead them down an ugly road

[00:11:31] [SPEAKER_02]: and few people are fighting back.

[00:11:35] [SPEAKER_02]: So there are elements of this that I completely agree with.

[00:11:41] [SPEAKER_02]: Aimlessness, right?

[00:11:43] [SPEAKER_02]: Lack of purpose.

[00:11:44] [SPEAKER_02]: Everybody needs to feel like they have a purpose.

[00:11:47] [SPEAKER_02]: Otherwise what's the point, right?

[00:11:48] [SPEAKER_02]: What are we doing here?

[00:11:51] [SPEAKER_02]: So trying to convince people at an early age

[00:11:55] [SPEAKER_02]: that they are intended for something

[00:11:59] [SPEAKER_02]: and to find that purpose

[00:12:02] [SPEAKER_02]: and then devote yourself to that purpose

[00:12:04] [SPEAKER_02]: and live your life with that purpose in mind.

[00:12:07] [SPEAKER_02]: Whatever that might be,

[00:12:08] [SPEAKER_02]: and you can have multiple purposes

[00:12:09] [SPEAKER_02]: and it can change over the course of your life too.

[00:12:13] [SPEAKER_02]: They seek men, seek belonging, purpose and advice,

[00:12:17] [SPEAKER_02]: but so do women by the way, right?

[00:12:21] [SPEAKER_02]: Especially women seek belonging and advice.

[00:12:25] [SPEAKER_02]: Right, that's actually one of the highest forms

[00:12:27] [SPEAKER_02]: of flattery you can give a guy is to ask him for advice.

[00:12:33] [SPEAKER_02]: Now my thoughts on this matter are greatly informed

[00:12:36] [SPEAKER_02]: by a book that I read a long time ago,

[00:12:39] [SPEAKER_02]: don't remember much about it,

[00:12:40] [SPEAKER_02]: but men are from Mars, women are from Venus

[00:12:43] [SPEAKER_02]: and the whole premise of the book

[00:12:44] [SPEAKER_02]: and they just kind of state that same premise

[00:12:46] [SPEAKER_02]: over and over and over and over and over

[00:12:48] [SPEAKER_02]: and over and over again

[00:12:49] [SPEAKER_02]: is that men and women are different.

[00:12:52] [SPEAKER_02]: That's the rub, okay?

[00:12:54] [SPEAKER_02]: I gave you the Pete's Notes version of the book.

[00:12:59] [SPEAKER_02]: And when men are presented with a problem,

[00:13:01] [SPEAKER_02]: men seek to fix it

[00:13:05] [SPEAKER_02]: and when they are thinking it through,

[00:13:07] [SPEAKER_02]: they retreat to a cave

[00:13:08] [SPEAKER_02]: and they think it through on their own,

[00:13:10] [SPEAKER_02]: they kind of turn it over in their mind

[00:13:12] [SPEAKER_02]: and if they're stumped, then they go to another dude

[00:13:14] [SPEAKER_02]: and they ask the dude for advice

[00:13:16] [SPEAKER_02]: and that's a lot for a dude to ask.

[00:13:23] [SPEAKER_02]: Women on the other hand,

[00:13:25] [SPEAKER_02]: tend to talk out their problems

[00:13:28] [SPEAKER_02]: and this creates actually a lot of friction

[00:13:30] [SPEAKER_02]: in relationships because a woman goes to work,

[00:13:34] [SPEAKER_02]: she comes home, she has a problem at the office

[00:13:37] [SPEAKER_02]: and the guy starts trying to fix the problem

[00:13:41] [SPEAKER_02]: that she is presenting to him

[00:13:42] [SPEAKER_02]: because that's what dudes do.

[00:13:47] [SPEAKER_02]: And like guys, we tend to define ourselves

[00:13:50] [SPEAKER_02]: by the hats that we wear,

[00:13:53] [SPEAKER_02]: the jobs we have, our profession, that sort of thing

[00:13:55] [SPEAKER_02]: and women tend to define themselves

[00:13:58] [SPEAKER_02]: by the relationships that they have.

[00:14:00] [SPEAKER_02]: I'm a mom, a grandmother,

[00:14:03] [SPEAKER_02]: a daughter, sister, that kind of thing

[00:14:04] [SPEAKER_02]: and so when the woman comes home from work

[00:14:07] [SPEAKER_02]: or whatever and says, I got this problem,

[00:14:12] [SPEAKER_02]: she wants to talk about it and the guy wants to fix it.

[00:14:15] [SPEAKER_02]: So the guy offers up the solution

[00:14:17] [SPEAKER_02]: and the woman's like, well, let me go over it again

[00:14:20] [SPEAKER_02]: and then the guy gets frustrated

[00:14:21] [SPEAKER_02]: because you're just rehashing all of this stuff again,

[00:14:24] [SPEAKER_02]: we already have the solution,

[00:14:26] [SPEAKER_02]: why don't you just take the solution

[00:14:28] [SPEAKER_02]: but she's not getting what she needs

[00:14:30] [SPEAKER_02]: out of that conversation which is to talk about it.

[00:14:34] [SPEAKER_02]: Men and women are different

[00:14:35] [SPEAKER_02]: but if you know this, then you can adapt.

[00:14:40] [SPEAKER_02]: Are you looking to be heard or are you looking for a fix?

[00:14:44] [SPEAKER_02]: You can ask that.

[00:14:46] [SPEAKER_02]: So the lack of purpose that men have

[00:14:49] [SPEAKER_02]: because our society is basically stripped it all away,

[00:14:54] [SPEAKER_02]: pulled down all of these various institutions,

[00:14:58] [SPEAKER_02]: created doubt about what their role is in the society,

[00:15:02] [SPEAKER_02]: yes, they are confused and drifting

[00:15:05] [SPEAKER_02]: and so when somebody comes along and says,

[00:15:07] [SPEAKER_02]: hey, I got this purpose for you.

[00:15:10] [SPEAKER_02]: Hey, I have an idea that you could do this thing

[00:15:12] [SPEAKER_02]: and then your life will have meaning

[00:15:14] [SPEAKER_02]: and you'll be doing something greater than yourself

[00:15:16] [SPEAKER_02]: and you'll be part of this club and all that.

[00:15:19] [SPEAKER_02]: Absolutely people can get taken advantage of

[00:15:22] [SPEAKER_02]: by the Republicans.

[00:15:28] [SPEAKER_02]: That's right.

[00:15:29] [SPEAKER_02]: Well, hey Democrats, maybe you could offer a message too.

[00:15:31] [SPEAKER_02]: How about that?

[00:15:32] [SPEAKER_02]: Something besides Tim Walz, who's a liar.

[00:15:35] [SPEAKER_02]: So when I was a kid, my grandpa died with Alzheimer's

[00:15:37] [SPEAKER_02]: and before he died, my mom and my dad

[00:15:39] [SPEAKER_02]: and all of us really helped take care of him

[00:15:41] [SPEAKER_02]: as he got progressively worse.

[00:15:43] [SPEAKER_02]: 40 years ago, there were no treatments

[00:15:45] [SPEAKER_02]: and not much support for caregivers and family.

[00:15:48] [SPEAKER_02]: Things are different today

[00:15:49] [SPEAKER_02]: because of the work of so many people,

[00:15:51] [SPEAKER_02]: including the Alzheimer's Association

[00:15:52] [SPEAKER_02]: of Western North Carolina.

[00:15:54] [SPEAKER_02]: It's a great organization with awesome people.

[00:15:57] [SPEAKER_02]: They've got huge hearts.

[00:15:58] [SPEAKER_02]: I've been a supporter for like 25 years.

[00:16:00] [SPEAKER_02]: This cause means a lot to me.

[00:16:02] [SPEAKER_02]: I participate in the annual walk to end Alzheimer's

[00:16:05] [SPEAKER_02]: and I am leading a Charlotte team this year.

[00:16:08] [SPEAKER_02]: It's called Pete's Pack.

[00:16:09] [SPEAKER_02]: You can sign up and join the team and walk with me.

[00:16:12] [SPEAKER_02]: It's on October 19th at Truist Field in Uptown.

[00:16:16] [SPEAKER_02]: Sign up at alz.org slash walk

[00:16:19] [SPEAKER_02]: and then just look for my team, Pete's Pack

[00:16:21] [SPEAKER_02]: and there's also a link in the podcast description here.

[00:16:24] [SPEAKER_02]: Also, I'm gonna be MCing the Gastonia walk

[00:16:26] [SPEAKER_02]: on October 5th, so make a team and join us

[00:16:28] [SPEAKER_02]: or make a donation to help me hit my goal.

[00:16:31] [SPEAKER_02]: I would really appreciate it.

[00:16:32] [SPEAKER_02]: There are a bunch of other walks around the Carolinas

[00:16:35] [SPEAKER_02]: and you can go to alz.org for all of the dates

[00:16:39] [SPEAKER_02]: and locations.

[00:16:40] [SPEAKER_02]: We are closer than ever to stopping Alzheimer's

[00:16:43] [SPEAKER_02]: and if you can help us get there,

[00:16:45] [SPEAKER_02]: we would really appreciate it.

[00:16:47] [SPEAKER_02]: Will you come walk with me for a different future,

[00:16:49] [SPEAKER_02]: for families, for more time, for treatments?

[00:16:52] [SPEAKER_02]: This is why I walk.

[00:16:55] [SPEAKER_02]: Russ says, relationship saver,

[00:16:56] [SPEAKER_02]: my wife and I figured out early

[00:16:59] [SPEAKER_02]: that she needs to tell me whether she's just venting

[00:17:02] [SPEAKER_02]: or seeking help.

[00:17:04] [SPEAKER_02]: Right at the outset, so it's so helpful

[00:17:06] [SPEAKER_02]: because as a guy, I still can't understand

[00:17:09] [SPEAKER_02]: why she'd be talking to me

[00:17:10] [SPEAKER_02]: if she didn't want a solution.

[00:17:12] [SPEAKER_02]: Right, like that's...

[00:17:14] [SPEAKER_02]: Why are you talking to me?

[00:17:16] [SPEAKER_02]: Nobody here.

[00:17:21] [SPEAKER_02]: He said also,

[00:17:24] [SPEAKER_02]: I'm seeing the males not going for Kamala story

[00:17:27] [SPEAKER_02]: play out with my college-age sons.

[00:17:29] [SPEAKER_02]: I've told you my older son and his roommates

[00:17:31] [SPEAKER_02]: listen to the podcast almost every day.

[00:17:33] [SPEAKER_02]: What's up, guys?

[00:17:35] [SPEAKER_02]: Thanks a lot, I appreciate it.

[00:17:37] [SPEAKER_02]: Have a good weekend.

[00:17:38] [SPEAKER_02]: They and their friends hate Kamala

[00:17:40] [SPEAKER_02]: because she has nothing to offer young straight men.

[00:17:42] [SPEAKER_02]: They're paying attention

[00:17:43] [SPEAKER_02]: because this will be both of their first elections.

[00:17:46] [SPEAKER_02]: I have encouraged them to explore all of the candidates

[00:17:49] [SPEAKER_02]: including RFK Junior, Oliver Stein and West.

[00:17:53] [SPEAKER_02]: They see Harris' social plans ignore them

[00:17:55] [SPEAKER_02]: and her fiscal plans would be a disaster.

[00:17:59] [SPEAKER_02]: All right, let me go over to Debra.

[00:18:03] [SPEAKER_02]: Hello, Debra, welcome to the program.

[00:18:05] [SPEAKER_01]: Hey. Hello.

[00:18:07] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, I was just gonna make a comment about

[00:18:11] [SPEAKER_01]: your men with purpose.

[00:18:12] [SPEAKER_01]: It's always interesting to hear.

[00:18:14] [SPEAKER_01]: And one of the first things that kind of crossed

[00:18:16] [SPEAKER_01]: my mind after Trump got shot was,

[00:18:19] [SPEAKER_01]: I wish he would have come out

[00:18:21] [SPEAKER_01]: and forgave him sort of immediately.

[00:18:25] [SPEAKER_01]: Because that was a young man

[00:18:27] [SPEAKER_01]: that was maybe searching for a purpose

[00:18:29] [SPEAKER_01]: and was radicalized to shoot him.

[00:18:32] [SPEAKER_01]: And it would have just, I felt like maybe

[00:18:34] [SPEAKER_01]: made a really good impression on young men

[00:18:37] [SPEAKER_01]: and young women in our country

[00:18:39] [SPEAKER_01]: that are kind of searching for a purpose.

[00:18:41] [SPEAKER_01]: And he should just forgive him

[00:18:44] [SPEAKER_01]: or publicly say something like that.

[00:18:46] [SPEAKER_01]: I just feel like that would be powerful.

[00:18:48] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, well, I mean, I guess it could have been

[00:18:50] [SPEAKER_02]: but that's not Donald Trump, right?

[00:18:52] [SPEAKER_02]: Donald, this is the guy who in an interview

[00:18:55] [SPEAKER_02]: five, six, seven years ago, whenever it was,

[00:18:58] [SPEAKER_02]: he said when he gets wounded,

[00:19:01] [SPEAKER_02]: he attempts to punch back

[00:19:02] [SPEAKER_02]: to unwound himself is what he said.

[00:19:05] [SPEAKER_02]: So that's his philosophy is that you

[00:19:07] [SPEAKER_02]: unwound yourself by wounding

[00:19:09] [SPEAKER_02]: the person that wounded you first.

[00:19:11] [SPEAKER_01]: But he could change and sort of have that message.

[00:19:15] [SPEAKER_01]: I feel like a lot of young people

[00:19:17] [SPEAKER_01]: are searching for a purpose.

[00:19:19] [SPEAKER_01]: And if he wants to be a really even better leader

[00:19:23] [SPEAKER_01]: than some people think he will be,

[00:19:26] [SPEAKER_01]: then he could take that stance.

[00:19:28] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, I mean, he could have, but yeah, I guess

[00:19:31] [SPEAKER_02]: but that's not him.

[00:19:32] [SPEAKER_02]: That's not him.

[00:19:34] [SPEAKER_02]: And I get it.

[00:19:35] [SPEAKER_02]: Deborah, I appreciate the call.

[00:19:36] [SPEAKER_02]: Good to hear from you.

[00:19:38] [SPEAKER_02]: John is up next.

[00:19:39] [SPEAKER_02]: Hello, John, welcome to the show.

[00:19:42] [SPEAKER_00]: Thanks for taking my call.

[00:19:43] [SPEAKER_00]: Yes, sir.

[00:19:44] [SPEAKER_00]: I have to say the best thing

[00:19:49] [SPEAKER_00]: that a woman has ever done for me

[00:19:51] [SPEAKER_00]: is tell me when I'm around, she feels safe.

[00:19:56] [SPEAKER_00]: That's the highest flattery

[00:19:58] [SPEAKER_00]: that a man can get in my opinion.

[00:20:01] [SPEAKER_02]: From a woman?

[00:20:03] [SPEAKER_00]: I'm a woman, yeah.

[00:20:04] [SPEAKER_02]: That she feels safe when you're around.

[00:20:07] [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.

[00:20:07] [SPEAKER_02]: Right, and so.

[00:20:09] [SPEAKER_00]: I used to work in retail

[00:20:11] [SPEAKER_00]: and I had customers that would tell me

[00:20:13] [SPEAKER_00]: the only time I come in here is when I see your truck

[00:20:16] [SPEAKER_00]: because I know I'm going to be safe.

[00:20:17] [SPEAKER_00]: And I'm like, okay.

[00:20:18] [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.

[00:20:19] [SPEAKER_00]: Right.

[00:20:20] [SPEAKER_02]: Well, because it taps into what is man's purpose

[00:20:24] [SPEAKER_02]: which is role of protector, right?

[00:20:27] [SPEAKER_02]: That's one of the, I mean, that's just ingrained in us

[00:20:29] [SPEAKER_02]: from millions of years of evolution and whatever

[00:20:34] [SPEAKER_02]: or by grand design by God,

[00:20:36] [SPEAKER_02]: either way you want to say it,

[00:20:37] [SPEAKER_02]: that's part of what makes a dude a dude

[00:20:40] [SPEAKER_02]: is this innate feeling to protect and to provide.

[00:20:46] [SPEAKER_02]: And when you rob men of that and say that that's not needed

[00:20:51] [SPEAKER_02]: and that's actually a bad thing,

[00:20:53] [SPEAKER_02]: then you're kind of ripping at the very core

[00:20:56] [SPEAKER_02]: of what it means to be a guy.

[00:20:58] [SPEAKER_02]: And John, I appreciate the call.

[00:21:00] [SPEAKER_02]: That status as protector, yeah.

[00:21:04] [SPEAKER_02]: And this is why I tell young men that in my own life,

[00:21:12] [SPEAKER_02]: for example, women and children first

[00:21:15] [SPEAKER_02]: when you're evacuating a place or like,

[00:21:17] [SPEAKER_02]: the ship is going down.

[00:21:18] [SPEAKER_02]: Why are women and children put on the boats first?

[00:21:20] [SPEAKER_02]: Why is it like, why is that always the case?

[00:21:23] [SPEAKER_02]: Well, it's because they're more important

[00:21:25] [SPEAKER_02]: in the society.

[00:21:27] [SPEAKER_02]: Women and children are more important in the society

[00:21:30] [SPEAKER_02]: to survive in those types of situations, right?

[00:21:33] [SPEAKER_02]: And that means they need other people

[00:21:36] [SPEAKER_02]: to put them forward as the more important elements

[00:21:39] [SPEAKER_02]: of the society, right?

[00:21:41] [SPEAKER_02]: The status that guys have, the physiological status

[00:21:46] [SPEAKER_02]: that guys have as physically stronger,

[00:21:51] [SPEAKER_02]: you are to use that for good.

[00:21:54] [SPEAKER_02]: You are to use that to protect the people

[00:21:56] [SPEAKER_02]: who cannot defend themselves.

[00:21:58] [SPEAKER_02]: That's the point.

[00:21:59] [SPEAKER_02]: It's not to beat up on other people.

[00:22:01] [SPEAKER_02]: It's not to take advantage of other people

[00:22:02] [SPEAKER_02]: and use force to get your way.

[00:22:05] [SPEAKER_02]: That's not the reason.

[00:22:06] [SPEAKER_02]: The reason is to protect the ones that cannot,

[00:22:09] [SPEAKER_02]: for whatever reason, protect themselves

[00:22:11] [SPEAKER_02]: in any given situation.

[00:22:13] [SPEAKER_02]: So that's a purpose.

[00:22:17] [SPEAKER_02]: And I feel like we have been robbing our men

[00:22:20] [SPEAKER_02]: and our boys of that purpose

[00:22:22] [SPEAKER_02]: by telling them that they shouldn't be those things.

[00:22:28] [SPEAKER_02]: There's also the economic part of it,

[00:22:30] [SPEAKER_02]: the provider part of it.

[00:22:31] [SPEAKER_02]: This is talked about in this piece

[00:22:33] [SPEAKER_02]: at persuasion as well.

[00:22:35] [SPEAKER_02]: Men with only a high school diploma,

[00:22:37] [SPEAKER_02]: typically earn about $1,000 a week

[00:22:39] [SPEAKER_02]: in today's dollars in 1979.

[00:22:43] [SPEAKER_02]: So today's dollars, but back then it would have been $1,017,

[00:22:46] [SPEAKER_02]: but now they earn 881.

[00:22:49] [SPEAKER_02]: So they've lost earning power over the last 40 years.

[00:22:54] [SPEAKER_02]: More than one in 10 men in their prime

[00:22:57] [SPEAKER_02]: are not working at all.

[00:22:59] [SPEAKER_02]: And it's not just about money,

[00:23:01] [SPEAKER_02]: but it's about status and life satisfaction.

[00:23:04] [SPEAKER_02]: As I mentioned earlier,

[00:23:06] [SPEAKER_02]: men define ourselves by the tasks we do,

[00:23:10] [SPEAKER_02]: the hats that we wear.

[00:23:12] [SPEAKER_02]: Women are out graduating men from high school

[00:23:14] [SPEAKER_02]: and vastly out competing them in college.

[00:23:17] [SPEAKER_02]: These women are not so interested in men

[00:23:19] [SPEAKER_02]: who are less educated or earn poorly.

[00:23:21] [SPEAKER_02]: So men without college degrees are marrying less.

[00:23:24] [SPEAKER_02]: Over 1.5 million men aged 20 to 24

[00:23:27] [SPEAKER_02]: are not in school, are not in training,

[00:23:30] [SPEAKER_02]: or not in work.

[00:23:32] [SPEAKER_02]: And these men are having a lot less sex

[00:23:34] [SPEAKER_02]: than past generations and they're more productive peers.

[00:23:39] [SPEAKER_02]: So unsurprisingly, young men without college degrees

[00:23:41] [SPEAKER_02]: report that they have the least optimism

[00:23:44] [SPEAKER_02]: and purpose in life among all the groups of men

[00:23:47] [SPEAKER_02]: surveyed by a firm called Equimundo.

[00:23:51] [SPEAKER_02]: Many have lost a reliable way to earn a living.

[00:23:53] [SPEAKER_02]: They also claim to have the least social support

[00:23:56] [SPEAKER_02]: and are uncertain how to have basic relationships

[00:23:59] [SPEAKER_02]: with friends, let alone romantic partners.

[00:24:02] [SPEAKER_02]: They feel their low status acutely,

[00:24:04] [SPEAKER_02]: but because popular culture aggregates their lives

[00:24:07] [SPEAKER_02]: with the men at the nosebleed top

[00:24:09] [SPEAKER_02]: of the economic ladder there,

[00:24:11] [SPEAKER_02]: they are told by much of the left

[00:24:13] [SPEAKER_02]: that they are privileged and should take a back seat.

[00:24:18] [SPEAKER_02]: That is the 2016 election right there.

[00:24:20] [SPEAKER_02]: This to me, this is the realignment that we're seeing.

[00:24:25] [SPEAKER_02]: It's at the heart of all of this

[00:24:26] [SPEAKER_02]: and this is not really political.

[00:24:29] [SPEAKER_02]: The parties use this stuff, but this is at the core of it.

[00:24:33] [SPEAKER_02]: It's this lack of purpose and being told

[00:24:36] [SPEAKER_02]: that the things that traditionally have led

[00:24:40] [SPEAKER_02]: to your satisfaction and success are no longer allowed.

[00:24:46] [SPEAKER_02]: For the two thirds of young men

[00:24:49] [SPEAKER_02]: who were willing to admit to researchers

[00:24:52] [SPEAKER_02]: that no one really knows me well,

[00:24:55] [SPEAKER_02]: that's the quote, no one really knows me well,

[00:24:58] [SPEAKER_02]: two thirds said that.

[00:25:00] [SPEAKER_02]: A sense of community might mean a lot to them.

[00:25:02] [SPEAKER_02]: It might mean even more to men

[00:25:04] [SPEAKER_02]: who report having no social activities at all

[00:25:07] [SPEAKER_02]: as one in six of all men

[00:25:10] [SPEAKER_02]: with a high school education or less claim.

[00:25:13] [SPEAKER_02]: One in six say they have no social activities at all.

[00:25:18] [SPEAKER_02]: What did I say about the men are from Mars?

[00:25:21] [SPEAKER_02]: Man caves, where do you think that term comes from?

[00:25:23] [SPEAKER_02]: Men go to their caves.

[00:25:27] [SPEAKER_02]: People won't know this about me,

[00:25:28] [SPEAKER_02]: but I will tell you, I am an introvert.

[00:25:30] [SPEAKER_02]: Like I am perfectly, and I have been my whole life,

[00:25:33] [SPEAKER_02]: I'm perfectly happy sitting in a room alone

[00:25:37] [SPEAKER_02]: talking to walls.

[00:25:39] [SPEAKER_02]: Look at my job, this is what I do.

[00:25:43] [SPEAKER_02]: So no, look, I am perfectly comfortable

[00:25:47] [SPEAKER_02]: going out and talking with people,

[00:25:48] [SPEAKER_02]: hanging out with people and all that stuff.

[00:25:50] [SPEAKER_02]: I can do that too.

[00:25:51] [SPEAKER_02]: I'm pretty versatile.

[00:25:52] [SPEAKER_02]: I'm a Renaissance man really,

[00:25:54] [SPEAKER_02]: but it takes a lot out of me.

[00:25:56] [SPEAKER_02]: Some people I hear,

[00:25:57] [SPEAKER_02]: this is the rumor with extroverts I have heard

[00:25:59] [SPEAKER_02]: and my wife is one of these.

[00:26:01] [SPEAKER_02]: She says that it energizes her.

[00:26:03] [SPEAKER_02]: It does not energize me, it drains me.

[00:26:07] [SPEAKER_02]: I get energized not being around a lot of people.

[00:26:12] [SPEAKER_02]: And that's fine, right?

[00:26:14] [SPEAKER_02]: Everybody's different, that's fine,

[00:26:15] [SPEAKER_02]: but you can't be an introvert your whole life.

[00:26:18] [SPEAKER_02]: Like I was watching an interview

[00:26:21] [SPEAKER_02]: that Jordan Peterson was doing with Matt Walsh

[00:26:23] [SPEAKER_02]: about his new movie, Am I Racist?

[00:26:25] [SPEAKER_02]: And he's talking about how like the worst thing

[00:26:30] [SPEAKER_02]: that we do in society to somebody who has broken the laws,

[00:26:36] [SPEAKER_02]: broken the norms of society, right?

[00:26:37] [SPEAKER_02]: The most predatory types of psychopaths.

[00:26:42] [SPEAKER_02]: And what's the worst form of punishment

[00:26:45] [SPEAKER_02]: that we give them?

[00:26:49] [SPEAKER_02]: Isolation, right?

[00:26:51] [SPEAKER_02]: You send them to prison

[00:26:52] [SPEAKER_02]: and you put them alone in a cell for 23 hours a day.

[00:26:57] [SPEAKER_02]: And it's like, that's the worst thing.

[00:26:59] [SPEAKER_02]: Cause even the most antisocial psychopathic type of person

[00:27:04] [SPEAKER_02]: needs human interaction of some kind.

[00:27:10] [SPEAKER_02]: She says that this leaves a lot of time

[00:27:14] [SPEAKER_02]: for web surfing and gaming.

[00:27:17] [SPEAKER_02]: And then of course that's where,

[00:27:18] [SPEAKER_02]: Steve Bannon finds them.

[00:27:24] [SPEAKER_02]: How dare he talk to their concerns?

[00:27:27] [SPEAKER_02]: But more and more often she says,

[00:27:30] [SPEAKER_02]: men are being recruited into extremist politics

[00:27:33] [SPEAKER_02]: and violence, not via far right ideology or racism

[00:27:37] [SPEAKER_02]: but simply by trying to figure out how to be a man

[00:27:39] [SPEAKER_02]: in a world where gender roles have changed precipitously.

[00:27:44] [SPEAKER_02]: Go, I think she may have just stumbled

[00:27:48] [SPEAKER_02]: upon something there.

[00:27:50] [SPEAKER_02]: Could it be that when you are engaged in the revolution

[00:27:55] [SPEAKER_02]: and you are tearing down institutions,

[00:27:58] [SPEAKER_02]: that there might be some unintended consequences of that?

[00:28:02] [SPEAKER_02]: I'm assuming of course

[00:28:03] [SPEAKER_02]: that this is not an intended consequence,

[00:28:04] [SPEAKER_02]: but you don't know.

[00:28:06] [SPEAKER_02]: You never know what the collateral damage will be.

[00:28:09] [SPEAKER_02]: And so when you are upending the society

[00:28:14] [SPEAKER_02]: in various ways, you're going to create anxiety

[00:28:18] [SPEAKER_02]: and ramifications that maybe you didn't see coming.

[00:28:24] [SPEAKER_02]: She says, go online and start looking

[00:28:25] [SPEAKER_02]: for typical questions that a man might ask

[00:28:27] [SPEAKER_02]: in the absence of any friends or role models.

[00:28:30] [SPEAKER_02]: Like, how do I find a date?

[00:28:32] [SPEAKER_02]: How do I build muscle?

[00:28:33] [SPEAKER_02]: And before long, well, I'll just go to Facebook.

[00:28:36] [SPEAKER_02]: My God, they just bombard you

[00:28:37] [SPEAKER_02]: with all of those little video clips.

[00:28:39] [SPEAKER_02]: Like, I'm so glad I learned this exercise.

[00:28:41] [SPEAKER_02]: Like, oh gosh, you click on four of them

[00:28:44] [SPEAKER_02]: and then all of a sudden, no, I'm kidding.

[00:28:46] [SPEAKER_02]: Before long, the algorithms pull these unsuspecting guys

[00:28:49] [SPEAKER_02]: into the Manosphere,

[00:28:51] [SPEAKER_02]: a world of online men support communities

[00:28:53] [SPEAKER_02]: that begins with many appealing on-ramps

[00:28:55] [SPEAKER_02]: for somebody trying to figure out how to live,

[00:28:58] [SPEAKER_02]: but ends in a swamp of men endorsing misogyny,

[00:29:00] [SPEAKER_02]: hate and violence.

[00:29:02] [SPEAKER_02]: Well, maybe if we offer an alternative view,

[00:29:07] [SPEAKER_02]: and course, men will take it.

[00:29:09] [SPEAKER_02]: All right, that'll do it for this episode.

[00:29:10] [SPEAKER_02]: Thank you so much for listening.

[00:29:12] [SPEAKER_02]: I could not do the show without your support

[00:29:14] [SPEAKER_02]: and the support of the businesses

[00:29:15] [SPEAKER_02]: that advertise on the podcast.

[00:29:17] [SPEAKER_02]: So if you'd like, please support them too

[00:29:19] [SPEAKER_02]: and tell them you heard it here.

[00:29:20] [SPEAKER_02]: You can also become a patron at my Patreon page

[00:29:23] [SPEAKER_02]: or go to thepetecalinershow.com.

[00:29:26] [SPEAKER_02]: Again, thank you so much for listening

[00:29:27] [SPEAKER_02]: and don't break anything while I'm gone.